Poem: "Anger and I"

My Dear Reader,

Fiction Fridays are back! The return to Fiction Fridays will be kicked off with this Emily Dickinson-inspired puzzle-poem. True to puzzle-poem form, you have to figure out what the subject of the poem is based on clues in the text. (A great Dickinsonian example can be found here.) This particular poem is structured that way because I think it adds to the feeling of the poem, not because it's hard to figure out. In fact, it should be pretty obvious.

Anger and I

Anger and I, we work as a team
He turns them red, and I turn them green
I whisper that something they love has been lost,
He keeps them worried, and shaken, and tossed
I make them fear that their love's on a hinge,
He makes their hearts burst and cry for revenge
I lie to them about what they deserve
He lies of audacity, gall, and of nerve

We work well together, dear Anger and I
So no lover can love, despite how they try.


-Cecily Jane

Poetry: Olympic Haiku Medley

My Dear Reader,

In honor of the 2008 Olympic Games in Beijing, China, I have constructed several haiku poems that kind of run together to form one big poem. It's not exactly Emerson, but I think that I caught the spirit of this year's games.

Yes, I know that haiku is Japanese.


If my team has more medals
But you have more golds
Than which team is the winner?

Well, since I can't change the past
I'll say that we win;
The one with the most is best.

Of course, if it were reversed,
If more golds were ours
I would say that gold wins.

We have to win, even though
You cheat with your girls
Who are less-than-sixteen.

Though we are in your home, we
Hate your government
And must prove ourselves better.

We also hate that you cheat,
Though we did before,
And may cheat in the future.

Because, even though athletes
Stumble, lie, and steal
At least that scum lies alone.

While we feel this in our hearts
We will flash our teeth
Pretend Olympic ideals

But no matter what happens
We will say we win
Because we want to be best.

-Cecily Jane

Poem: The Travels of Malicious May

My Dear Reader,

This should make you laugh.

The following poem is proof that when a writer has a deadline, she will sometimes come up with some of the craziest things that any human being has ever thought up in all of existence, especially if that writer happens to be a big fan of Dr. Seuss. I recently dug up this poem that I wrote for a class a few years ago, and I promise that I was completely in my right mind at the moment, though I might have been suffering from a lack of sleep and the desperation that comes when something is due in less than an hour. Just to be clear, it's really not supposed to make sense.

And here I am, posting it publicly. I wonder what that says about the kind of person I am.

The Travels of Malicious May

On a bright summer’s day
You can see all the way
To the mountain of Diggery-Ding

There the bears and the trees
And the birds and the bees
Sit around by the campfire and sing

If you listen real close
You can hear the bears toast
To the creature they featured that day

Then, if you pay attention,
You’ll notice them mention
The travels of Malicious May

Who’s this person, you ask?
Why she had the small task
Of filling her pail at the well

But when May arrived there
She then found contrived there
A small group of Diggery-Dells.

Now, the Dells are a species
That sold Mitsubishis
On a strip mall by Macey’s and Smith’s

But May, on Mount Digg’ry,
Got scared as a Giz’ry
And forgot what she’d heard of in myths.

Running off, May then faced who,
If dells go and chase you,
Appears with his sharp claws and bells

It was Chase the Garezbra
Who’s striped like a zebra
And protects those afraid of the Dells.

But May didn’t notice
That Jeff’s brother Otis
Was chasing the Dells far away

So, she only saw Chase
And punched him in the face
And has never returned to this day

So when you climb the mountain
In search of the fountain
Don’t scream when you run into Chase

‘Cause he’s already scared
Of the fight that he shared
With the one we call Malicious May


-Cecily Jane

Song Parody: "The Missouri Compromise"

My Dear Reader,

I sang this once for a church talent show, and they still talk about it. That's because I absolutely rocked. It's a parody of "I Will Survive," and it started out as a homework assignment in my high school American history class. To learn more about the famous compromise that was a futile attempt to mantain the balance of power in the pre-civil War U.S., click here.

"The Missouri Compromise"

At first they were afraid
They were petrified
They didn’t want Missouri on the other side
But the North gave it up, and the South gave them Maine
Thanks to a guy
By the name of Henry Clay

The union’s safe
For one more day
And now that Henry’s here to help us, we’ll relax and shout, “Hooray!”
South states want another slave state
North states want another free
We compromised
In the year 1820

Go on and try
Tear us apart,
Oh, but you can’t now, we’re compromisers from the start
When they were faced with tyranny,
What did Founding Fathers do?
They compromised
And now we’ll do it too!
We must devise
A compromise
If the North and South can’t get along we surely will divide
We will give a state to them
They will give a state to us
And we’ll be strong
And we’ll all get along
Hey, Hey!

It took all the strength we had
Not to fall apart
And just try to keep the powers balanced on the chart
We are sick of fighting wars, we don’t want another one
If you want bloodshed, just wait ‘til 1861!

Just look at us, with liberty!
We’re the picture perfect model for democracy
Sure, we’re still enslaving men, but the rest of us are free
And that works well for everyone who's in the white majority!

Go on and try
Tear us apart,
Oh, but you can’t now, we’re compromisers from the start
When they were faced with
What did Founding Fathers do?
They compromised
And we’ll do it too!
We must devise
A compromise
If the North and South can’t get along we surely will divide
We will give a state to them
They will give a state to us
And we’ll be strong
And we’ll all get along
Hey, Hey!

-Cecily Jane

Spenserian Sonnet: "You Are a Jerk"

My Dear Reader,

This is the first in a series of creatively fictional pieces, which will be posted every Friday (that's right—even MORE Cecily). This particular piece is a Spenserian sonnet I wrote for my early British lit class. I got a ninety-nine out of one hundred.

It is not about me.

You Are a Jerk

I asked you out last weekend, but I guess
You’ve got some other plans this Friday night.
She’s not as good for you, but I digress;
I know you knew that I’d be free tonight.
For now, it seems you want me out of sight.
You think this dating thing is just a game?
You think that I’m a person you can slight?
I thought that we had fun, but now the shame
Descends on me, and I feel really lame.
I wonder if you think I came too strong
And why you’ve got the hots for what’s-her-name
And have you always liked her all along?
Well, thinking on it, I know what to say:
I never really liked you, anyway.

-Cecily Jane